This was one of the conversation I had with AK while I was stuck in the jam driving AK to the LRT station.
Me: (thinking about the jam, the work I am heading to, the financial setback, future, etc while grumbling about the jam and cursing at those KL people driving like it is their grandfather's road) Life does not have to be this way
AK: Other people is doing it and has no problem with it.
Me: Well, other people is just accepting it, does not mean they enjoy it.
AK: Then why can't you accept it?
Me: Because I feel life should not be this way.
AK: Then what can you do?
Me: If life is as what it is now, then I rather kill myself. Relieve myself from such life.
AK: Why must you say such thing?
Me: (Knowing I am wrong to say such thing but do not want to admit it) Ya la. Not true meh? Better I just disappear and then no need to go through all these feelings.
AK: (getting angry) Go find a new job then
Me: (lazy and unsure of my feelings but I feel that it is not the only reason) It is not that simple. Sigh.
I guess these "emotions" had something to do with the crazy week I had. Met an accident on the way back from KL town (another post will be posted on this incident), had a slight trauma after that, dealing with fixing the car, dealing with financial problem, etc. Bloody hell, I hate feeling this way. Maybe I am just being a baby.
Me: (thinking about the jam, the work I am heading to, the financial setback, future, etc while grumbling about the jam and cursing at those KL people driving like it is their grandfather's road) Life does not have to be this way
AK: Other people is doing it and has no problem with it.
Me: Well, other people is just accepting it, does not mean they enjoy it.
AK: Then why can't you accept it?
Me: Because I feel life should not be this way.
AK: Then what can you do?
Me: If life is as what it is now, then I rather kill myself. Relieve myself from such life.
AK: Why must you say such thing?
Me: (Knowing I am wrong to say such thing but do not want to admit it) Ya la. Not true meh? Better I just disappear and then no need to go through all these feelings.
AK: (getting angry) Go find a new job then
Me: (lazy and unsure of my feelings but I feel that it is not the only reason) It is not that simple. Sigh.
I guess these "emotions" had something to do with the crazy week I had. Met an accident on the way back from KL town (another post will be posted on this incident), had a slight trauma after that, dealing with fixing the car, dealing with financial problem, etc. Bloody hell, I hate feeling this way. Maybe I am just being a baby.
Remember the "writing down" process you did before? Guess it's time to write down pros/cons of alternatives and then take the next difficult step of acting on them.
If you think you'll be miserable staying at the same place, take the chance and change. No guarantee it'll be better. If not better, then change again. These are still better at staying in misery, right?
Definitely easier said than done. Unfortunately no other way. Oh oh got one way: accept the situation and live with it. Some people can do that.
Guess your new boss has not made your job happier. JJ is right, change or accept. In the old days, people just stick to the same employer--going through good and bad bosses. Nowadays, both employer and employee loyalty are diminishing.
During jams, try singing along to music, or say prayers for others as distraction. I do that, and it does help as a form of distraction from the problem at hand. SR
You need to find a means to lighten up. You have beauty, job, house, good husband, cute DJ, many positives--dwell on these. Can you find a job closer to home? SR